March 2012
OUR SON'S FIRST DAY OF DAYCARE
28/03/12 18:47
Thursday was Conor’s first day at daycare. I arrived with his diaper bag, his toys, and his baby bottles. And of course, Conor. Valerie had left earlier in the morning for her first day as a consultant so Conor and I were on our own. I handed Conor to the nice lady who couldn’t wait to take him. He easily went to her and when cradled comfortably in her arms, turned around and smiled broadly at me. I put his things in his locker that had his name on it, kissed him goodbye, turned around and walked out.
I got back in the car and continued my drive to work. I have so much to do at the office that I kept thinking of all the tasks when suddenly it hit me – I just dropped my son off at daycare. I suddenly felt sad. Not because he was with strangers while we worked, but because I realized he was growing up. And I’ve enjoyed having him as a little baby for these last 5 months. On the one hand, I’m looking forward to Conor growing up so we can do grown-up things together, but on the other hand, I like him just the way he is now. Right about then, a Boston cab driver cut me off. This was enough to snap me out of my funk and realize it’s just another step in the cycle of life. I flipped the cab driver off, turned up the radio, and drove the rest of the way in a typical Boston stressful posture.
When my wife and I picked Conor up at the end of the day, he was all smiles and was none worse for the wear. Valerie showed me he had received the first report card of his life. It read, “Conor did great his first day. He took four naps, listened to stories and played with a ball.” My wife started crying and I looked at my son and said, “Well son, maybe you’ll do a better job raising hell next time. But not bad for your first day. Let’s go toast a bottle." So he had his, and I had mine. Valerie just rolled her eyes.
Comments
SPENDING THE WEEKEND WITH MY SON ALONE
CONOR EATING SOLID FOOD FOR THE FIRST TIME
21/03/12 10:19
I never realized how convenient formula from a bottle was until we tried to feed our 5-month old solid food for the first time. I've seen plenty of pictures of babies with food all over their faces but I figured those parents just weren't proficient enough to hit the mouth the first time. I was wrong. Even if you get the food to the mouth, they blow it back out, they drool, and they turn their heads to look at the dog, the clock or the paint on the wall. They just don't cooperate. Conor liked his sweet potatoes just fine, but the next morning things weren't good. I smelled something strange when I walked by the crib first thing in the morning. It didn't smell like anything that ever came from his crib before. I took a second look and decided to give Conor a good morning hug. That's when the wheels came off. The smell was awful. He looked up at me and smiled and I noticed a little wetness on his shirt. I lifted the shirt and it wasn't pretty. Let's just say it took me and my wife to undress him, hose him off, and get him back to respectable. Surprisingly, he wasn't interested in his bottle for half the day. He would drink about an ounce and take a nap. A little concerned, we called the pediatrician and she asked us a few questions. She thought he might have a stomach bug and that the solid food wasn't the culprit. But we weren't so sure. At about 4pm, he started drinking his formula again and has been a model citizen ever since. I told my wife to get rid of those sweet potatoes and let's try apple sauce. It's got to smell better coming out the other end. She begs to differ.
HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAY
Conor started to show signs of standing while we were visiting his Mimi in Austin, Texas last week. On St. Patrick's Day, this half Irish baby decided it was time to go for it. I was surprised at his effort. So I did a little research to see what was going on. I wondered if there were some exercises I should be doing to encourage this behavior. According to the Baby Center in the UK, "when it comes to motor development, you don't have to worry about any special exercises. Your baby will progress in a predictable pattern. First, she will achieve head and neck control, then torso and upper body strength, then lower limb strength. In early infancy, a baby may enjoy pushing with her feet or even bouncing as you hold her. Her natural reflexes enable her to engage in this activity, but she won't necessarily always want to take part in this type of play and some babies may not enjoy it at all. Later, when her torso is stronger and she is getting ready to walk, she will be able to stand upright."
Here's the link to the article i found at BabyCenter.com.
IF A COW CAN JUMP THE MOON
By the time Conor was 3 weeks old, I was already tired of "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star", "You are My Sunshine" and a few other songs I could barely remember from childhood. Bored by the classics, I started making up a song for him and within an hour I had written four verses and a chorus that he seemed to like. Granted he was 3 weeks old but it kept him from crying unlike "The Eyes of Texas Are Upon You," (even though that's not a children't song.) Now Conor is 5 months old and is completely captivated by the song as you can see in this picture. No matter what kind of a rotten day he's having, as soon as I hit the first few notes of the song, he stops crying and starts smiling. Here's the lyrics;
"What Can Little Boys Do When They Try" written and copyrighted by Steve Kolander
If a cow can jump the moon and pigs can learn to fly
What can little boys do when they try
Run and catch a frog, learn to ride a dog
What can little boys do when they try
Find a great big tree, carve a boat and sail the seas
What can little boys do when they try
Build a rocket made of cans, launched with rubber bands
What can little boys do when they try
Try, try, try
What can little boys do when they try, try, try
Anything can happen when you try, try, try
What can little boys do when they try
If a big, bad wolf can smile and three pigs can laugh and cry
What can little boys do when they try
Learn to ride a bike with their hands up in the sky
What can little boys do when they try
Tame a lion with a chair
Juggle monkeys, hug a bear
What can little boys do when they try
Learn to go to bed when their pillow hits their head
What can little boys do when they try
Repeat Chorus and go to bed
CONOR MEETS KAWLIGA IN AUSTIN FOR THE FIRST TIME
One of my dads's favorite songs when I was growing up was, "Kawliga" by Hank Williams, Sr. It was a song about an old wooden Indian who just stood in front of the tobacco store and never knew love. It was a song of a beautiful Indian maiden who came to the store but because Kawliga was wooden, he could do nothing about another man who came to take the Indian maiden for his own. It was a sad song that would lead a man to drinkin' like all good country songs do. As my son and I passed by the tobacco store on West 7th street in Austin, I felt compelled to take our picture. My wife didn't understand the significance but obliged us just the same.
THERE'S A GOAT IN MY BACKYARD
13/03/12 23:20 Filed in: baby | father | son | grandparents | songs | nursery rhymes | entertainment
Grandparents have the best songs for kids. The stuff we hear these days is watered down kumbaya crap. Conor's grandpa is singing about a goat that will knock you from foolish to silly.
THIS WAS BOUGHT FOR MY 4-YEAR OLD SON 15 YEARS AGO
In 1993, I went to the Borneo jungle for an adventurous vacation. I spent a week in the jungle to see the endangered Proboscis monkey and the endangered Orangutans. It was a hair-raising journey with only myself and a guide. On the final day of my trip, we went to the Sepilok Forest to visit the orangutans. These apes are super intelligent and also bold. They would come down out of the trees and steal people's cameras, hats and umbrellas. They would climb back into the trees and you could often say so-long to your valuables.
I fell in love with these apes and I thought that i would one day soon have a child that would love to play with this stuffed orangutan. It has sat in the closet for over 15 years waiting and just yesterday, I gave it to Conor. He laughed when he saw the hairy ape and began to hug it and play with it. Unfortunately, it started to shed and I got nervous he would swallow some of the hair so after a couple of minutes of playtime, I perched it on the top of the crib where it looks over him, but he can't eat it.
GOOD MORNING, SON
Conor awoke at 6am. He didn't scream. He didn't cry. He giggled. And gurgled. And played on his own. I tried to sleep with one eye open but it was no use. I had one ear on Conor. And one ear on my thoughts. Today is the first day of SxSW 2012 and I always get excited about what there is to be learned that will make me a better writer. A better marketer. A better leader. A better blogger. But right now, I decide it's better to just be dad. So I peel back the warm bed cover, walk over to Conor's travel crib, pick him up and kiss him good morning. He rewards me with the best gift a child can give his dad; he smiles at me with all the innocence that the definition offers. I'm proud to be his dad. And he's perfectly content to be my son. I revel in the glory. Knowing it will fade by the time he's a teenager.
NEVER PUT OFF TOMORROW WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY
The importance of father and son activities can best be seen in this 5-second film I discovered on Vimeo. The moral of the story is to never put off tomorrow what you can do today.
THERE'S SOMETHING SPECIAL ABOUT BROTHERS
My brother and I don't see much of each other these days, maybe once a year as I live in Boston and he lives in Austin. As Conor turns 5 months old tomorrow, it was good for Michael to finally meet his only nephew. Michael was the first person i told that my wife was pregnant fourteen months ago and i still remember how a tear came to his eye. He was so excited to finally be an uncle and he was glad that I would finally get to understand the joys of being a dad that he felt as a father of four. We probably won't see each other again for 6 months to a year. And those two hours in Mondola's Restaraunt in Austin, Texas will be the only reminder of getting to see my nephews, Michael and Ethen, his his only glimpse of his nephew Conor until we meet again. It's far from ideal but as the world gets smaller, I somehow manage to drift farther from the town i once called home. Still, my brother and I always manage to find something that we still have in common and we hang onto those moments until it's time to say goodbye. This time, it was a conversation of both being dads and how good it feels.
WE'RE ABOUT TO FLY WITH OUR FOUR-MONTH OLD
Tomorrow, the Kolander family flies from Boston to Austin for this year's SxSW 2012 Interactive Conference. It's the first time since we've had Conor that we've attempted to fly. We skipped a holiday flight to Ireland in December because Conor was barely two months old and hadn't had all his vaccinations. Now, there's no excuse.
We're nervous. We remember being the kid-free adults cringing as the mother would walk down the aisle juggling a diaper bag, a screaming kid and hand-held luggage to shove into the overhead bin. I would always hope they would stop before they got all the way to my seat and sit down next to some other poor sap. But now, I'm the guy with the 4 month old, who at any given moment can explode into sobs of discomfort, annoyance or hunger. The question is, will I be able to intercept the audible pangs before they become the equivalent of fingers on a chalkboard for a plane full of business travelers.
This has led me do a little research on how to entertain kids on a plane to keep them in check. First of all, I didn't find any fool-proof method so that was a disappointment. But I did remember that before Conor was born I was searching website for kid tidbits and I found an article about traveling with a child. And that there's a baby hammock available that you attach to the tray table in front of you and the other half is attached to you. And the baby fits inside the hammock so you can see the baby at all times without him being draped across you for the entire flight. Well, I purchased that contraption before Conor was ever born and I pulled it out of the drawer last night. People swear by these things so I plan on trying it Thursday.
As my research continued, I really begin to see the advantage of buying Conor his own seat so I can use my infant car seat for him. We did not do this and I now have a call into my wife to see if it's still possible. (I would do it myself but don't have the flight information at my fingertips.) Many airlines offer a 50% discount for infants so this would help with the cost.
Other Tips I found that may help;
1. Relax, travel used to be fun! Let's just pretend it still us. If you are uptight the baby will definitely sense it and start to also get uptight.
2. Buy a seat for the baby to guarantee that you can use your infant safety seat on the plane — securing the child in one will make the trip easier for you and safer the your baby (typical 50% domestic discount but baby then gets full baggage allowance so easier to check in more stuff)
3. Have a bottle available for take-off/landing to keep the baby swallowing — helps lessen pressure in the ears. (Swallowing/sucking during landing is more important than during take-off as landing is harder on the ears.)
4. Pack at least 50% more diapers than you think you'll need, and extra wipes — air travel has a way of clearing out little guts
5. Get to the airport early — allow at least an extra 45 to 60 minutes for last minutes feeds and diaper changes pre-boarding, and getting through security is a time-consuming nuisance, especially with a baby.
6. Remember that despite what a few FT members think, infants screaming on planes is neither criminal or fatal. We'd all prefer to minimize it, but sometimes it is just gonna happen. And when it does, probably most parents on the plane are more in sympathy with you than angry (and secretly glad it's not their baby this time)!
Found at; http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/archive/t-406377.html
Here's a link to the Flyebaby report; http://airplaneflyingwithkids.blogspot.com/2010_11_01_archive.html
http://www.babycenter.com/0_flying-with-small-children-checklist-of-questions-to-ask-you_1460940.bc
WE'RE GOING TO NEED A BIGGER NIPPLE
We arrived home this evening to our seasoned babysitter feeding our little boy on the sofa. They both looked very much at home and comfortable. It only took a couple of minutes for the babysitter to let us know we were going to need a bigger nipple for our baby bottles. She announced that at almost 5 months old, Conor is sucking so hard to get the milk out of the bottle that he's wearing himself out and falling asleep before he gets the proper amount of milk. She then looked into her crystal ball and told us if he was getting the proper amount of milk that he probably wouldn't wake up in the middle of the night but instead could well sleep a full 10 hours without waking up. Valerie and I looked at each other and knew as soon as we got the babysitter out of the house that we were headed to Babies R' Us to get some bigger nipples. We'll soon find out if we get to sleep through the night. I'm starting to count sheep as I write this.
To find out how to buy bottles and nipples, click here.
CONOR IS WRESTLING BULLS INSTEAD OF COUNTING SHEEP
As Conor sneaks up on 5 months old, he is finally starting to play with his stuffed animals. And one of my favorites is Bevo. This beloved Longhorn was given to him by my longtime friend, Pat Vires, whom I went to UT with many years ago. After all these years, she hasn’t forgotten me and now needs to meet Conor. We travel to Austin on Thursday so he’s been wrestling Bevo while I sing, “The Eyes of Texas”. He laughs now but just wait until I introduce him to a real Longhorn. Then we’ll see how much cowboy he has in his blood.
POO WILL SOMEHOW BRING THEM TOGETHER
Yesterday, i was taking care of Conor while mom was out having lunch with a friend. I was trying to clean up my website which had bogged down because of content. I was mulit-tasking because I still had to watch the 4 month old while I boiled his bottles for the barrage of eating that was sure to take place throughout the day.
If you’ve been following this blog, you know we also have a 7-year old dog that has taken well to Conor. We keep tabs on them all the time so there’s never any chance of incidents. But I doubt if that would ever happen. Just the same, I was watching as El Dog would walk by Conor in his bouncy chair now and again and lick Conor’s toes, hands or face on a drive-by. At some point I noticed El Dog was spending more time licking Conor’s toes than the other drive-by’s. I watched for a few seconds and decided to get a closer look. Turns out El Dog wasn’t licking Conor’s feet but instead, had found a little diaper leak and was interested in more than toes. I pushed the disgusting mutt aside and whisked Conor up for a diaper change.
Why is it that one man’s disgust is another dog’s delicacy?
ONLY 10 HOURS AND 52 MINUTES UNTIL BEDTIME
Im sitting in here with Conor at my feet at 8am on a Sunday morning. You see, Valerie and I have a daily ritual; she gets up in the middle of the night for his feeding and at the first crack of light, it’s my turn to get up because he’s not going back to bed and she gets the last attempt at sleep before the day grabs us by the hair and pulls us around for the next 11 hours making us do this and that.
I’ve already fed him, changed his diaper, sang him songs and made bodily functional noises for which his mother rolls her eyes as I teach him the humor of the male species.. Now he’s only got 10 hours and 52 minutes left until he goes back to bed for the night. It’s not easy to keep a 4 month old entertained.
ONLY TIME WILL TELL
Every morning before I go to work I give Conor is very own concert. We start out with Twinkle, Twinkle plucked on the high strings. Then we move into “Desire,” I song I wrote years ago that the Dixie Chicks picked up and recorded. This is his favorite song and his arms wave and his feet kick the guitar as I play. Then we move on to “Pearl Handled Pistols” in which is grins as if he’s an old gun slinger reincarnated. And finally, I sing a song I wrote for him when he was 3 weeks old called, “What can little boys do when they try.” This puts him in a great mood for me to leave for work and hand the boy over to his mother. I wonder if he’s taking all this in to be a guitar player one day. He watches my fingers make the chords as if he’s memorizing them at 4 months old. Only time will tell.
MY SON JUST REACHED OUT TO ME FOR THE FIRST TIME
Today was a long day like most days at the agency. And the long ride home in the traffic gives me a chance to run the daily grind around in my head one last time before sugar plums erase just enough of the 9 to 5 so that I naively do it again the next day. So as I pulled up to the house and grabbed by computer bag and unlocked the door, I heard my wife call from upstair, “Hi honey.”
I dropped my bag and coat on the couch and headed upstairs where my son and wife were busy at the changing table. As soon as i said hi, my son smiled and reached out with both hands to be held. It’s the first time he’s ever done this and almost brought me to tears. I was speechless. I grabbed him up and squeezed him and looked at my wife and said, “Did you see that? You saw that right?” She laughed and her eyes turned red. “He loves you. You know that.” Yeah, but he reached out and acknowledged me and demonstrated some kind of love for me. Wow.